After finishing an MS in  Counseling from The State University of New York at Albany, I worked in several roles including counselor, instructor, and Rehabilitation Facility Administrator. I felt I needed additional skills in order to lead well and pursued a lot of Continuing Education at Cornell University where I fell in love with the field of leadership development.

Eventually, I taught weekly cohorts of leadership classes.  I noticed that people arrived early, stayed late, and called me in between sessions.  Obviously, they wanted individual attention.  I saw this as my niche, pursued a number of certifications, and began my first company with that focus in 1989.  

The Center for Creative Leadership recruited me for this expertise where I became an Adjunct faculty member. In that role I coached hundreds of clients primarily to enhance their people skills and their coaching skills including be more aware of themselves and others, manage their emotions, understand and work with other personalities.

The Prayer of St. Francis has been a touchstone for me my whole life. In case you are not familiar with it, here are a few lines. 

Lord, make me an instrument of Your peace.

Where there is hatred, let me sow love.

Where there is injury, pardon.

Where there is despair, hope.

Where there is darkness, light.

Where there is sadness, joy.

When I was very young, I was introduced to the word “vocation” as a calling.   I think this prayer reflects my vocation, my calling. I have been very blessed to have my prayer answered many times over.

My favorite projects are those right in front of me at any given time.  I throw myself into understanding the person or the organization fully—their strengths, their hopes and their gaps.  I came off a call recently and squealed to my husband “I LOVE IT when the client does what we agreed they would do”.  Watching them put the plan into action and getting them the results they had hoped for is big!  As a tv personality used to say, “I love it when a plan comes together.”

My clients would tell you that I am pretty darn good at paying attention, listening and reflecting back non-judgmentally.

I seem to have been born that way. My father used to say that even as a kid, everyone in the family came to me for counsel when they had something heavy on their mind.  I would listen with great compassion as they poured out their hearts, and they would walk away feeling so much better and seeing a solution that they couldn’t see before after we talked. 

Of course, my husband thinks I make a mean blueberry pie. He is particularly good at keeping me grounded. We do a lot of couples mentoring so it is a shared passion/calling/ministry of ours.

I’m a natural extrovert, and revel in one-on-one exchanges, small gatherings and large group interactions.  The expression “never met a stranger” applies.  Glad to inquire and listen to others, glad to tell the latest hopefully entertaining story if they ask or there is a lull in the conversation. 

I have been mentored by some of the very best.  One of these mentors always said “We have to be a product to the process.”  She held herself to a high standard of practicing what we espoused for our clients.  While none of us do this perfectly, we aspire faithfully to doing so.

Another mentor drilled home the message “If things are going to change, I’ve  got to change; if things are going to get better, I’ve got to get better.” In other words, personal responsibility for change is paramount. I think that a superior coach or mentor drills this message home in word and practice. 

I am also a firm believer that people are very capable. I believe in their potential and hold that view of them until they catch up with the view that I hold for them.

I believe that a coach needs to be coachable themselves and be a lifelong learner, encouraging that mindset with clients.  Superior mentoring asks good questions that cause people to think so that people have this capability honed and owned for long after the mentor is gone. 

We know that telling people what to do does not work.  Insights they discover as a result of good assessment and questioning fire a whole new pattern in the brain. 

Translating insight into action—the “so what” of the insight application going forward is essential to real change.  I am all about people translating insight into action with each mentoring session.  Homework and accountability is crucial.  Movement is a law of physics that moves potential energy into kinetic, usable energy.

There are many.  I often ask this question of my clients and my list of favorites expands!  Make Me a Sanctuary is the one that came first to mind when you asked though.  It is my hope and prayer.

I like to utilize our WHITESSPACE methodology, because it gets to the heart of client issues, expectations and goals very effectively. The process includes pausing to check the individual’s personal compass and its current trajectory to see if any course correction is in order.  Often it’s just those few degrees that has them veering off track.  When they pause, breathe, assess, hear their hopes and then get on with a doable plan, magic happens.   

My husband and I live on 38 beautiful acres in the heartland of North Carolina. The property has been in the family since the Great Depression and was a working farm until the mid-nineties.  That’s a lot of history.

We are surrounded by nature and we love practicing the gift of hospitality in this serene, quiet setting we call Pilgrim’s Rest. It provides added significance in my work because we sometimes deliver personal retreats right here in this quieter-paced locale.

My dream clients are learners.  They are open and responsive to feedback.  They also express feedback freely to me throughout our work; we use our relationship as a laboratory for practicing these skills.

They recognize me as their advocate and trust me to be in their corner—that wanting what is in their best is my core motivation.  They follow through on our agreed upon plans.  One who comes to mind I called “Secretariat” because she ran like the wind; her capacity was so great, she learned so quickly and applied so diligently.

I have enjoyed working with a number of Iron Men athletes—male and female.  They are overcomers; they take on their personal and leadership development with the same passion they do an athletic event.

I really enjoy working with people of faith who want to integrate their spiritual lives into all that they do and are.  It’s fun to work with a faith based organization to share what we know about leadership in the secular world that can help people live and work together more effectively in all-too human organizations no matter how pure our intentions.